Me

Me: Don’t worry mum if you fall into a tree I call the fire brigade.

Me: Yes officer my mother is stuck in the tree. It’s nothing urgent, can you said any single- I mean available people to help with the rescue?

Me: And mention I’m single.

Me: I mean they’re already at my house so why not.

Me: You know my address, here’s my number so you can call when you pick me up friday? Say 7:30? Great.

Me: Oh and uh, don’t wear a shirt.

And yes this is a frequent occourence in my house when discussing my dating life and potential for meeting new people. #soapoperalife

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